


Hollow Bones

by minhakos



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2019-07-14
Packaged: 2020-05-13 03:59:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19243393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minhakos/pseuds/minhakos
Summary: In an isolated city where the rain never stops falling, Levi believes he has found freedom from the sad eyes that always begged him to stop. The beautiful green eyes that watch him now though make him feel alive again, make the urges uncontrollable, and the strange boy with a strange tale becomes his only release.





	1. Hollow Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually... wrote chapter one a good few years ago, so apologies if there's anything funky about it. I did go back in and edit it, but it's possible chapter 2+ may feel a bit different due to my writing style (possibly) changing!
> 
> This is my first chaptered fic I’ve posted in a long time! I’m sorta bad at keeping up a writing schedule, but I really want to bring this fic into the world, because I’ve been thinking about the plot off and on for a good few years lol. So please, any comments/reviews are super appreciated and will inspire me to get my writing done!
> 
> I also wanna say that even though this is tagged Levi/Eren, I can’t say there’ll be much “romance” romance. 👀

The rain fell hard, continuous, darkening the sky. It always rained in this city. Not a soul dared to step out into the streets without some sort of protection from the heavy raindrops. Life was scarce that day, though, only a few unfortunate souls rushing to their destination. The sky continued to weep mercilessly, as it always did.

One would think that those who lived in the city were used to this, but just the thought that they had not caught a glimpse of the sun in so long held them back from growing any sense of normalcy. They begged for sunlight, yet no one left. No one was brave enough to. It was almost as if the raindrops created a cage around the town, happily letting strangers in but strictly keeping those inside from leaving.

A lone man strode down the street, his hands shoved into the deep pockets of his black trench coat, the hat sitting dangerously low on his head his only protection from the pelting rain. He let his eyes wander over the shop windows he passed, nothing particularly catching his interest.

"Dear heavens, sir, you'll catch a cold like this," a middle-aged woman spoke from the door of her shop, glancing up at the crying sky with a grim expression. "You really should carry more protection from the rain."

The man offered no response besides the tip of his hat as he continued past her. He was no stranger to this town, as many often assumed he was. He was simply the only soul in the city who had adjusted to the solemn reality of their situation. Besides, Levi didn't mind the rain.

_"It's like you don't even care... Do you even love me?" She stared at him, amber eyes drowning in tears locking with soulless grey orbs. He gave her nothing in response to her worries, her fears, and she felt as though she was suffocating. She had to end this. "Get out."_

_"With pleasure."_

A soft vibration against his outer thigh had the man pulling his cellphone from his pocket, the device held up to his ear loosely by his thumb and index finger. "What."

"Are you really not coming back?"

He held back a snort at the question. "Last I checked, I'm not welcome there."

"What happened? She won't tell me anything..."

"I'll leave it up to your imagination."

Levi simply ended the call at that, shoving the device back into his pocket. He glanced over toward the street, shifting over on the sidewalk to hug the walls of the shops a bit more closely as a car sped by, the large puddle at the curb splashing his way. He was glad it had missed his upper body, but a look of disgust grew on the male's face as he took another step. The insides of his shoes were drenched. Though he may be used to getting mostly soaked by the rain, Levi had never been able to stand the feeling of wearing wet socks.

A string of profanities spilled from his lips as he held the heel of one shoe down with the other, pulling his foot out slightly to confirm his suspicions. With a sigh he jammed his foot back into the dress shoe, ready to abandon his plans for the day. As he turned on his heels, ready to just head back to his home, Levi paused, eyes narrowing slightly. He could feel it--someone was watching him. It would have sent shivers down his spine, if he hadn't already grown accustomed to the feeling.

"Everything fine there, deary?" His eye twitched, the feeling that he was being watched disappearing in an instant as he turned to the elderly woman standing next to him. He knew it couldn't have been her, but the thought quickly sank to the back of his mind as he felt his feet drowning in the water captured by his shoes. His scowled served as a good enough answer for the woman, and she silently waved him in the direction of her shop. "Would you like to come in for a moment to dry off?

"Don't really see the point, since I'll just be fucking drenched the moment i step back outside."

The woman didn't flinch at his harsh language, simply offering a warm smile. "Well we could at least dry off those socks of yours?"

And he found himself walking into the shop within seconds. He was not about to pass up the opportunity to burn his socks dry, and in turn be able to continue with his plans.

Glancing around the interior, Levi raised an eyebrow slightly as he took in his surroundings. The shop looked more like a personal den, with various types of animal heads mounted on the wall above a large brick fireplace. Below his feet was the pelt of a large animal, and Levi felt a miniscule amount of pity that the rain that so tightly clung to him was now pooling on the fur below. _Look what you’ve been reduced to. How pathetic._ Various trinkets and items Levi had never seen before were placed in glass display cases around the room, obviously well-loved as he couldn't see a speck of dust on any of them.

"I'll just get the fire started, then. Why don't you have a look around?" Her voice was sweet, and Levi could feel his nails digging into the skin of his palm as he clenched his fist, stiffly nodding his head before stepping out of her line of sight.

_"That couldn't have been you... right? Why... How could you do such a thing?" Tears were streaming down her cheeks, and Levi had to wonder when she wasn't crying because of him. He had no excuses, no answers, but he didn't feel as though he owed her one._

_It was painfully obvious that it had been him. He wasn't trying to hide it._

Tugging his hat off, Levi shook his head slightly, raindrops falling from the black locks, his fingers uncurling on himself. He moved his hand to run through his hair, but stopped as he noted the small pearls of red littering his palm. Sparing the old woman a glance, she had only managed a measly spark or two, so he decided to wander the store while he waited for her to start the fire. The store wasn't all that big, a line of display cases acting as a half-wall that separated the room into two intimate spaces. Levi stepped further from the woman and looked at the cases with boredom in his eyes. One case in particular held what looked like the skull of a young child, but Levi only spared it a passing glance.

He stepped past them and into the other section of the shop, and almost instantly the feeling returned. He was definitely being watched. Levi stood still, careful of his own breathing as he listened to the sound of the elder woman placing a log into the fireplace, humming softly to herself. Oh how the song reminded him of old times. But there were no other sounds, aside from the steady buzz of rainfall, so he made his way in.

The contents were almost exactly what had been in the other section, save for the pelt on the floor belonging to a different animal and the fireplace being replaced by a large grandfather clock which seemed to no longer have any life to it. The deer heads on the wall stared down at him with their black, lifeless eyes, and Levi just rolled his own eyes. Maybe the feeling of being watched had come from the dead animals scattered across the walls. _That'd be fucking hilarious._

A faint creak, and the raven-haired male spun on his heels toward the direction of the sound, his hands reflexively clenching. Sat in the corner of the room was a single rocking chair, slowly creeping forward before gravity pulled it back. Like the tide ebbed and flowed against the shore, the rocking chair continued its slow but steady cycle of motion. He would have relaxed at that point, if it hadn't been for the body seated in the chair. He had been sure that there had only been two souls in the shop--him and the woman. How had he not noticed the other? Had growing accustomed to the atmosphere of the city dulled his senses?

Taking a cautious step closer, Levi's eyes narrowed as he examined the figure before him. It was obvious to him that the person seated before him was male--he never made that mistake. Short brown locks messily stuck up in random places, which irked Levi and made him want desperately brush them into place. The male sat slightly slumped to the side, his elbow propped up on the armrest, chin resting on his palm. His eyes were closed, seemingly asleep in the chair, so Levi took the chance to crouch down and take in the other's facial features. He seemed to be relatively young, Levi concluded as much simply by the state of the boy's sun-kissed skin. He had spent too much time observing others' skin to not be able to measure their age with it.

He seemed serene, at peace. Almost too much so. Something about this didn't sit well with Levi--the boy hadn’t moved an inch, no rhythmic rise and fall to his chest to indicate that he was even breathing. He set down his hat and reached a hand out toward the boy, overcome with a sudden urge to wake him up, his other hand clenched so hard that his knuckles flushed white, but he halted his actions as he heard the old woman's voice calling for him. With a sigh he pushed himself up, stretching his arms slightly and watching the boy with a calculating gaze for a long moment before he turned to walk away.

The woman was standing in front of the fireplace, glancing at Levi with a soft smile as he stepped over to her. He removed his shoes in silence, tugging his socks off with a look of disgust before simply tossing them into the fire. The woman blinked at him, not having expected him to destroy his socks but simply set them by the fire to dry. Levi pulled a small towel from the inside of his coat--luckily it had stayed dry--and proceeded to dry off his shoes.

"Oh dear, would you like a new pair of socks? I believe my husband may have some around here..."

"Fuck no. I'm not wearing someone else's disgusting socks."

She simply nodded, accepting his answer. "Would you like something to drink then, dear?"

"I'll have to pass," he spoke softly, leaning over slightly to pull his shoes back onto his feet. He was hardly thrilled about having to press on with no socks, but it was his most sanitary option at this point. "I have business to attend to, if you'll excuse me."

"Of course, dear." She walked him toward the door with a smile on her lips, and Levi once again found himself digging his nails into his palm. "Do your best to stay dry!"

With a nod he stepped back out into the downpour. Just as he had stated at the beginning, he was fully drenched once more within a matter of seconds. He stood still, simply accepting the cold embrace of the rain, before stepping away from the shop. It was odd and he couldn't explain it, but Levi felt a slight sense of relief as he left. The old woman had already made his palms itch, but the boy... The boy had made him want to dig his nails deep into his own flesh.

 _Speaking of..._ He turned his head toward the shop one last time, glancing into the display window. It showed the room where the boy sat, still slumped over slightly, still rocking on his chair. Levi’s hat remained on the ground by the boy’s feet and if it weren’t for the fact that the two remained there on their own, he might have gone back in for it. Levi almost hadn't noticed it, but as the feeling crept back over him, he kept his gaze on the boy, a dark expression growing on Levi's face.

His eyes were open. Watching him.

 

_"You know, I always loved your eyes," he hummed, legs crossed as he sat calmly across from the female. She looked up at him, a mixture of hopefulness and worry etched onto her features as she offered a slight smile. His hand gently tightened around hers, but she quickly pulled her hand away to rest it on her lap instead._

_"I need to know where you were last night." She tried her hardest to keep her voice calm, to mask her fear and confusion, but as he simply stared at her and raised an eyebrow, she knew that she wasn't fooling him. "Please, just tell me that you weren't there."_

_"You and I both know that I can't do that." He leaned back in his chair, a soft smile on his lips, yet his gaze was as cold as ice. She felt as if she had been frozen in time--the only thing she could do was look into his eyes, silently pleading for there to be a shred of guilt, remorse,_ something _in his eyes. But there was nothing._

_"What..." She let out a shaky breath, trying her best to stay composed. "What happened to you?"_

_He could only watch her, amused. What indeed?_

 

The walk back to his apartment had been uneventful at best--nothing ever changed in the city anyway.  He could always count on the rain to accompany him wherever he went. Most days the streets would contain at least a handful of people going about their business. Most seemed to prefer to either drive or stay home if the former wasn’t an option. Truthfully, it baffled him at times that there were so few people who actually accepted the city for what it was and went on with their lives. He had been a recent addition to the populace and he was more comfortable than most of the citizens that had lived in the city their entire lives.

Granted, he still stuck out like a sore thumb as one of the few people who never tried to fight away the wetness with an umbrella or raincoat.

He shoved a hand into his pocket, pulling out his key and sticking it into the lock. It took a couple attempts to get the small piece of metal to actually turn, but once the door was open Levi simply pocketed his key and stepped inside, kicking the door closed behind him.

His apartment was small, but that was what he had wanted. He had never seen the need for endless space without a purpose, preferring for everything to have a neat little place, in an attempt to keep some sort of order. Levi’s apartment hardly held many items in the first place. Aside from the necessary furniture, the most personal items one would be able to find where the many books set in the lone bookshelf in his bedroom. There were no pictures, no framed photos hung up on the walls. It hardly looked like anyone spent time in the apartment, which was true. Levi truly only used the space to eat, sleep, and occasionally read.

He much preferred not to bring his work home with him now--not after she had figured out his last project.

With a sigh Levi shrugged his jacket off, placing it carefully on his coat rack before stepping into his bathroom and peeling the rest of his wet clothing off of his body. After neatly folding each article and setting them to the side, he opted for a quick hot shower. It usually didn’t bother him to be drenched to the bone, drained of all color from how cold the rain would leave his body, but an indescribable urge told him that he needed to warm up his body, get his blood flowing.

One shower and a good portion of a book later, he decided it was time to attempt to get some sleep. Levi hardly slept these days--not due to anything like wandering thoughts or nightmares, but instead waves of urges that had left his hands covered in blisters due to how often he dug his nails into the skin of his palms. His sleep schedule always got fucked over the longer he went between projects. _Time to start a new one._

And the boy came to mind. The boy, with his tan skin and silky brown hair. He had seemed on the thinner side and likely around Levi’s own height, though it was hard to tell for sure since he had remained hunched over in the chair. He wondered how he moved, if he was graceful as he walked across a room, if he held a strong or weak presence.

He wondered what the boy’s eyes looked like. Though during the final glance at him Levi had definitely seen the boy with his eyes open, staring right at him, he was unable to recall just how exactly his eyes looked.

_"You know, I always loved your eyes."_

Levi found himself chuckling slightly as he lay on his mattress, gaze fixed nowhere in particular as nothing but darkness surrounded him. He was starting to feel a bit predictable, though if he thought more about it, this was the least likely path he would have considered. A boy, and a young one at that. He rolled onto his side, letting his eyelids fall shut.

_Gotta remember to go back for my fucking hat._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be gore going forward in this story (maybe not starting in chapter 2, but it will come relatively quickly) so I've rated the story Explicit just to be safe! I don't think I'll be the best at actually describing gore in a gross way, so it might not even be that bad, but still a warning!


	2. Hollow Words

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: (as) graphic (as I could manage to write) violence in this chapter. you have been warned!

Sometimes when he would leave his apartment, a passing neighbor would ask him about Nifa. Simple questions such as how was she doing, how was her work, if she’d be able to come to a get together, et cetera. He would shrug them off with simple answers: she was fine, work was good, she didn’t care about the get together so fuck off. They’d grown used to his crude responses but would still ask anyway, out of some vain sense of decency. Like they were good people for continuously asking about a woman who no one had heard from for almost a year.

Levi knew nobody that asked truly cared about Nifa, because despite how strange the situation obviously was, nobody pressed any further. Not that he minded. If nobody asked where she was, Levi didn’t have to cover anything up.

He still got letters for her regularly in his mailbox, but nothing was ever personal. It was highly likely she had had a falling out with her family and moved to the rainy city to get away from them, because when he had been apartment hunting, she had almost always been alone. The few companions she had were always replaced with someone new fairly quickly.

This had provided him with the perfect opportunity.

Truthfully, Levi didn’t know where Nifa was. He knew where he had left her, but not what had happened to her after that. And he didn’t really care.

Shoving some spam mail into a nearby trash can, Levi stepped out of the apartment complex and started down the sidewalk. The weather was more manageable than it had been lately, more of a light drizzle greeting him than a hellish downpour. Part of him preferred the heavy weather though. It made him feel more at ease.

It had been a few days since Levi had stepped foot outside of his apartment complex for anything other than a grocery run. Often times, when the urges felt stronger, he’d disconnect from the outside world and simply read all day. It didn’t exactly help, but it was usually a good distraction.

Usually, until Levi realized he had run out of books to read.

He had quite the library in his apartment, consisting of a vast array of genres. Sometimes he would be in the mood for a good work of fiction, other times Levi would spent hours on end reading science or medical books. Not exactly subjects he gave a shit about, but sometimes there would be pieces of information that would pique his interest. It always depended on the day, his mood, and the strength of his urges.

But when he had moved he had only been able to bring so much of his collection with him.

Though he had lived in the rainy city for about a year now, he had never felt the need to wander into any bookstores, until now. The last thing he needed was to have nothing to read while he was holed up in his bedroom. Levi wasn’t opposed to rereading the books he owned, but considering that he had already reread most, if not all of them, it was about time his collection had some new additions.

If that wasn’t motivation enough to get him out of his apartment, it definitely helped that he’d pass by the antique shop, where he had left his hat a couple days ago, on the way to the bookstore. It wasn’t a hat he particularly cared for, but Levi knew that if he left something of his misplaced, it would annoy him to no end.

The hat was the only reason he was planning to make an extra stop today. It had nothing to do with the mysterious boy and the old woman he had encountered.

_Excuses, excuses._

The streets were livelier than usual, thanks to the lighter rainfall, and Levi did his best to avoid eyecontact with anyone he passed. It wasn’t very hard, considering the other citizens often did the same. There was a strange, unsaid code amongst the people who lived there that Levi had picked up on relatively quickly--everyone lived their life on their own. There were no big events, no city-wide celebrations that rallied the people to gather together.

“They wouldn’t have much to celebrate anyway, with how miserable their lives are,” Levi mused. He knew that if anyone around heard him, they’d likely agree. Nobody was truly happy here.

The bookstore was his first stop. He didn’t have any particular genre that was calling to him, so Levi wasted a good few hours simply going up and down every aisle, stopping at any book that happened to catch his eye. Even if they didn’t seem all that interesting when he pulled them off the shelf, more often than not he’d still add it to the shopping basket he had grabbed. It was better to be safe than sorry when it came to the amount of books he had, so Levi was never too picky. He’d get around to reading them all eventually, even if they ended up being miserable reads.

There was a fair number of people inside the store that day, but no one spoke to him, save for the employee that happened to walk by and notice that his basket was practically full.

“If you’d like, I can hold that up at the register for you,” she spoke softly, sweetly, and offered him a smile. Levi wanted to roll his eyes at how hard she was trying, but held back the urge and handed the shopping basket to her. The woman eyed him quickly before heading over to the register.

Levi ducked into the nearest aisle and grabbed the first book he saw, to keep his hands occupied. _The Dollmaker._ Skimming the summary on the back, the man couldn’t help but chuckle at the slight relevance he felt between him and the book. But he knew how these kinds of books typically ended, which made him place it back on the shelf.

He much rather preferred the cold truth to happy fictional endings.

By the time he made it back to the front of the bookstore, only a few new books in hand, the rain outside had picked up. He wouldn’t have minded, if it weren’t for the twenty or so books he was in the middle of purchasing. The woman behind the register noticed the scowl on his face.

“If you’d like, we can either hold these for you to pick up on another day,” she started, leaning forward with her elbows on the counter. Levi hadn’t noticed how strong her perfume was until now. “Or we could box them up and have them mailed to you.”

The former meant having to return to the bookstore, which would be a pain now that the woman was obviously hoping he’d choose that option, and the latter felt rather ridiculous, considering his apartment was only a ten minute walk down the road. But Levi knew he’d never touch the books if they ended up soaked, and he’d rather have his hands free for his other stop.

“Mail them, I guess,” he replied, pulling a pen from his coat pocket as the woman passed him a piece of paper for him to write his address on, her lips pouted in disappointment. Levi had to keep his gaze down, a feeling of disgust suddenly growing within him.

Once he had taken care of that, he set off into the pouring rain.

He didn’t have any sort of plan for what would come next, but truthfully he never really did. They were always more like spontaneous projects in his mind. Rarely did more than a few days of thought go into his projects, save for the last one before he had left.

_“How long has this been going on…?” She choked back a sob, unable to even look at him. “When did this start? How long? God, Levi, it’s like I don’t even know you anymore!”_

_“It’s more like you never did,” he snapped back, hands clenched at his sides. “How long, you ask? When did it start? I think you’re asking the wrong questions, dear.”_

_“And what’s that supposed to mean?” She glanced up at him._

_Those eyes._

_“You should be asking when it was that I stopped, took a break. Because this all started long before you.”_

The soft jingling of the bell at the shop entrance brought Levi back from his thoughts. It had only been a few days since he had last stepped into the space, but he found himself looking over everything once again, as if it were a new experience. Admittedly he had been quite irritated when he had been here before, so it was no surprise to him that the more minor details hadn’t stuck with him. What he did remember was where the woman had lingered, where he’d placed his hat, and where the boy had sat watching him.

“Deary? Is that you?” A soft voice drifted throughout the room, belonging to the old woman who had so kindly, so foolishly, allowed him to enter her store before. “I wasn’t expecting you for quite a while.”

He raised an eyebrow at that. Was she expecting guests today? Was the boy maybe out and meant to return soon? Either wasn’t exactly favorable for Levi..He didn’t respond to her, only reached behind him to turn the lock on the door.

Even if he couldn’t be sure, Levi had a feeling that the boy was inside. He had to be.

Taking a slow step forward, Levi walked into the main room of the shop. The fireplace where he had burned his socks was the first thing to greet him, and the sight quickly brought back the feeling of disgust he had had before. The old woman was nowhere in sight, but Levi could hear the creaking of the floorboards above him. He hadn’t even noticed that there was a second story before.

How should he go about this? It was a little late to try and come up with a game plan now that he was already inside, but if the woman wasn’t an immediate concern, he decided to make his first objective locating the boy.

It was easy for him to guess where he was, as the faint sound of the rocking chair falling forward then back made its way to him. With any luck, the boy was asleep again.

A door closed and Levi quickly stepped out from the middle of the room, resting against the wall.

_It came from upstairs... She has to be on her way down now._

He stepped back toward the entryway, using a corner to keep himself obscured as the sound of footsteps filled the room. They were soft and slow and getting closer with each step. She was almost there, so it was time for him to be ready.

It had been about a year since he had felt this thrill.

Wherever the staircase was located in the shop, it didn’t lead into the room Levi had been watching. He could hear the old woman’s soft humming, the sounds of her rummaging through various items, he even heard her say something, though it was too faint for him to make out. He could only assume she was talking to the boy, which meant she was in the connecting space.

His hands fell into his coat pockets as he stood up straight, gaze fixed on the direction she would surely appear from any moment now. His palms tingled as the woman continued humming a soft tune and he did his best to avoid scratching them by wrapping his fingers around the long object he had made sure to bring with him. The handle was smooth, and fit perfectly within his hand.

It was his favorite knife, after all.

Footsteps drew closer, and it only took a matter of seconds before she came into view, a warm smile on her lips. A smile Levi hated. She had stopped humming at this point, taking a sip from the tea cup in her hand.

“Would you like a cup too?”

Levi had almost thought she was speaking directly to him, but she turned back to where she had emerged from when she spoke.

Nobody responded, but she continued.

“I believe this was your mother’s favorite blend,” the woman mused, stepping toward the fireplace. A number of logs sat in the pit, and she set down her tea cup on a nearby ledge to grab a box of matches. Levi simply watched from the shadows as a warm light filled the room. He hadn’t noticed how dim it was until the dancing flames flushed out the darkness.

_I could use those._

She had no idea what would happen next. Neither did Levi for a moment--he hadn’t decided if he should catch her by surprise or wait until she noticed him. He never had a preference, he would just choose what worked best in that instance. And truthfully, he found enjoyment in both. Surprising her meant a quick path to his high, but there was always added excitement in the struggle. Not that she’d likely be able to put up much of a struggle, considering how old she was.

Levi decided not to drag it out. She was expecting someone, after all. There was an unknown time limit, and it would be rude to be in the middle of something when said visitor arrived.

There wasn’t even enough time for the old woman to lift her cup of tea up to her lips before Levi had stepped forward, pulling the knife from his coat pocket and plunging it directly into the middle of her back. The tea cup shattered as it slipped from her hand fell to the floor.

An uncomfortable silence fell across the room, both Levi and the woman incredibly still until the woman inhaled a sharp breath, her whimpers of pain and confusion destroying the silence. It was so faint that Levi had almost missed it, but the steady rhythm of the rocking chair had stopped also.

She turned her head slowly, eyes wide with confusion and fear. When her gaze finally landed on Levi standing directly behind her, she attempted to choke out a question between her pained whimpers. Levi didn’t give her the chance to speak though, as he swiftly pulled the knife from her back, a splatter of blood staining the floor and his shoes. He’d have to remember to either clean or just simply dispose of them later.

“Dear...?” Recognition flashed across her face as she continued to stare at him, and fear quickly took its place the longer she looked at him.

Levi wore an expression of absolute boredom, completely detached from what was happening.

“Thank you for the shelter from the rain the other day,” he began, running a finger down the length of his blade. Blood instantly stained his skin, and it was only in moments like these that he didn’t find it utterly disgusting. “Probably a bad idea to let strangers in though.”

Her legs felt weak, and before she could reach to hold onto the ledge in front of her, the old woman fell to her knees, gasping for air. Levi crouched down to keep them on the same level. He tilted his head, grey eyes locked on the knife instead of the woman before him. He watched the way the blood gathered at the tip of the knife, small droplets falling to the ground. It was so red, and so warm as he slid his fingers over it once more.

“W-Why?” She managed to choke out the question, barely able to stay up on her hands and knees as she weakly attempted to drag herself away.

Levi simply shrugged his shoulders and stood up. “Why not?”

She couldn’t even react before Levi had slammed his foot down against her, to keep her in place. He took a moment to straighten his back and take a breath before once again crouching down over her and plunging the knife into her side.

He repeated the action over and over.

By the time he sat back, the old woman was long gone. The pool of blood around her had spread across the room, staining the nearby animal pelt that had been used as a rug. Levi didn’t care at that moment about how much of a mess he had made. Blood had splattered onto the walls and onto himself, but he was more interested in the knife that now remained plunged to the hilt inside of her.

He’d never be able to explain how much he loved seeing that knife stuck inside a once living being. His mother had given him that knife.

With a long breath he leaned in, wrapping his fingers once more around the knife’s handle. He pulled it from her slowly, watching the way the flow of blood from the wound increased once the knife was fully removed. He laid it across his palm and dragged it against his skin, cleaning the blood off the blade. Levi simply placed the blade back inside his jacket pocket before looking down at his hand, which was dyed red in the old woman’s blood.

His palm didn’t itch anymore.

“Now then,” he exhaled, pushing himself up onto his feet. “Time to clean this fucking mess.”

As much as Levi would have liked to simply enjoy the experience a bit longer, the guest she was expecting lingered in the back of his mind. Sure he had locked the door, but the mysterious visitor could have a key and just let themselves in. He didn’t have the luxury to take his time, which is why he was thankful for the fire the woman had started before he had killed her.

The fireplace itself was impressively large and contained tall, strong flames just waiting to burn up all the evidence. He made quick work of folding up the bloodied animal pelt and tossing it into the fire. After that was taken care of, he found a small bathroom and grabbed just enough towels to clean up, but not enough to make it obvious that there were some missing. He used them to wipe up the blood on the floor and the walls, and also on his own shoes. The red rags were tossed into the fire next.

The final obstacle was her. This was the point where he realized he really should have had a plan for this specific instance. How could he get rid of her? He never had a time limit like this, and usually was able to be more mobile. But Levi didn’t want to remove her from the shop and risk the boy in the other room leaving before he came back.

_Fuck._

He wasn’t internally cursing himself out because he was out of options, but because the one option he knew he could rely on was a fucking mess. Not that he hadn’t just made one, but he had already cleaned that up.

Levi groaned as he made his way around the shop space, glancing past doors he found and making his way to the second floor before he finally found what looked to be a kitchen. He was lucky that the woman or someone else who spent time there seemed to enjoy cooking meat.

The cleaver he had found was just strong enough to get the job done, though it took more time than he had wanted. Everything was thrown into the fire and at that point Levi had given up caring about any sort of time limit. The fire would destroy the evidence, but it would take some time to burn up everything. And the bones would remain. That would surely be suspicious, but Levi had remembered the array of skulls he had seen in a display case the last time he visited, so decided to grab those and the other bones he found to mix in with her’s. All he could do was assume that no one would care enough to look too closely at them.

The smell of burning flesh though would be hard to get rid of, but the rain would help wash some of it off once he left.

There was only one thing left now, and Levi made sure to thoroughly wash his hands before stepping into the other room. There he sat, hunched over in the rocking chair just as he had been last time. It intrigued Levi how the boy had barely moved, if he had even moved at all. He took quiet steps forward, closer, right to his side.

But there was no reaction. Not when Levi stood right in front of him, and not when he flung the boy over his shoulder and carried him out of the shop.

It was weird how light the boy was. Even as they walked down the street, pelted by the heavy rainfall, it didn’t feel like he had the dead weight of a sleeping human being on his shoulder. Well, whether he was sleeping or not, Levi didn’t know. How someone could be so still, so lifeless, had him wondering if the boy was even alive. But there was a warmth that radiated from him. Levi couldn’t describe it, but he felt life from the boy.

He knew what truly lifeless bodies were like, after all.

The streets were once again empty, and by the time he had reached his apartment complex, Levi was sure the stench of burning flesh had been washed off of him by the rain. Any warmth that had clung to him had been washed away also, and without even thinking about it, Levi had simply thrown the boy down on his mattress and went straight to the shower once he had made it into his apartment. With the water at a boiling heat, Levi spent the rest of the night scrubbing his body raw, so that no morsel of the woman remained on him.

The boy simply laid on the mattress, quiet, unmoving, but with his eyes wide open.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think it was pretty obvious in chapter one what Levi was up to, but I hope that everyone's very ??? when it comes to our mysterious boy 👀 the real real plot of this story will kick in from here on out! I also hope that everyone who is reading is okay with me trying for weekly updates! I say trying because my mood for writing this particular story legit revolves around the weather. my mood to work on this story skyrockets whenever it rains, go figure lol. but please let me know what you think of this chapter!!! also I'm sorry for any typos... I don't exactly beta/revise... I do a read-through and try my best to fix things up but yea! ugh this was actually hard for me to write though akjdhfksd I wanted a dark fic, but I've never actually written a dark fic with violence before so... sorry if it was an awkward read!


	3. Hollow Eyes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who else is in pain over the fact that not only did s3 end the other day,,,, but now we have "the final season" coming... I know titan's gotta end, but I don't want it to. TT I vented my sadness over these things by writing this chapter lol. I hope you all enjoy!!

He just stood there, staring straight ahead. The rain pounded down against his body, chills running down to his bones. The only light in the sky came with a crack of thunder, illuminating the entire city, leaving no shadows even a corner to hide in, before everything went dark not even a second later. He stood there, in the middle of the storm, staring straight ahead.

It was only after a long pause that he took a step forward. And the more steps he took, the angrier the sky became. The crashes of thunder grew louder. The flashes of lightning became more frequent. He was sure they were touching down close by. Sometimes it felt as though the lightning was at his heels, right behind him, waiting to strike.

Levi continued on though, not being deterred from reaching his location.

The last time he remembered a storm this bad had been the day he had slit his mother’s throat.

He made his way around the city, searching for something yet with no real destination in sight. He knew that something was out there though, something that he needed to find. Levi couldn’t explain it, but it was almost as if there was a voice lingering in the city, calling out to him. Against his better judgment he let the voice lead him in circles, up and down the streets, around every corner. The voice hardly made sense, no real words being formed, but Levi felt as though he understood it.

Listening to the voice made his palms tingle, yet the itch never fully emerged. It was like he was stuck right before getting to reach his high, but he knew he’d be able to find the release he craved so badly if he followed the voice.

Surely enough, there it was. As he felt the pull down a nearby alley, Levi narrowed his eyes, trying to get a better look in front of him. The lightning had stalled, so he stopped, waiting for another flash of light to reveal what was waiting for him. A couple of minutes passed with nothing but darkness and Levi vaguely noted that there hadn’t been a single soul in the city aside from him. Nobody walking down the sidewalk, nobody driving down the road, he couldn’t even remember if he had passed any windows with the lights on.

What time even was it? When had he gone outside? Why had he left his apartment?

Bolts of lightning drew paths across the sky as everything was enveloped in a flash of light, and Levi looked forward.

There he was, buried between large bags of trash by a dumpster. The boy simply sat there, his face obscured by the trash, but Levi was sure his eyes were closed. He didn’t feel like he was being watched.

Levi stepped forward, stopping right at the end of the boy’s feet.  _ Barefoot. How disgusting. _ Cold eyes trailed up the boy’s body, the repulsed expression on his face only deepening as he noted how dirty the boy was. It was truly like he had just been thrown out with the rest of the garbage.

But how had he gotten there?  _ I took him-- _

A crack of thunder filled the air and Levi glanced over his shoulder, just to make sure the following bolt of lightning hadn’t stricken the space right behind him. It was off-putting just how much it felt like the storm was following him, targeting him.

A soft rustle brought Levi’s attention back to the mess in front of him, and he just managed to catch sight of the boy’s head falling to the side. Something about the boy’s movement was so strange, so unnatural, and it intrigued Levi to no end.

“Oi.” He tapped his foot against the boy’s, a look of irritation of his face as he reached into his jacket to pull out a pair of gloves. No reply came and Levi just grunted and crouched down, his face scrunched up in distaste as he shoved the bags of trash away from the small body between them, doing his best to ignore the god awful stench coming from them.

It was a disgustingly familiar smell that Levi couldn’t place until one of the bags he pushed over fell open, spilling out a bit of its contents. He glanced over with bored eyes and simply stared at the pale fingers sticking out from underneath the trash bag.

“You killed her.”

His gaze snapped back to the boy in front of him, who was now staring up at him. His eyes were large and beautiful, the color of emeralds. Levi had always found Petra’s amber eyes to be the most beautiful pair he had ever seen, until now. Just looking into the boy’s eyes made his palms burn.

Levi sat back on his heels and simply stared into the boy’s eyes. The eyes that stared back at him were practically glowing, full of life and endless emotions they wanted to tell, yet they seemed so empty at the same time. Something about the mixture of life and death in those eyes captivated Levi.

“I did,” he finally responded, before narrowing his eyes. The boy had spoken, hadn’t he? It was the first time Levi had heard his voice, and even though it had been less than a minute ago, he couldn’t remember a single detail about the boy’s voice. Had it been deep? High? Angry? Matter of fact? For some reason he couldn’t remember.

Leaning forward, Levi placed a hand on the boy’s shoulder, giving him a not so gentle yank to move him away from the trash. The boy’s body was limp in his hands, allowing Levi to hook his arm under the boy’s own arm and drag him a few feet from the heap of trash. When Levi let go, the boy simply slumped onto the ground and Levi stared down at him.

“Oi, what the fuck is wrong with you? Don’t fucking keel over right here.”

He stared down at the boy, watching how the rain soaked the few spots that had remained dry underneath the garbage. Now they both were soaked to the bone as the storm raged on.

“I want to go home…”

It was faint, but Levi was sure he heard it, and instantly made mental notes about the voice. It sounded so young, so light, so sad.

He crouched down again and tugged the boy up into a seated position, making sure he didn’t fall over when he slumped forward. Levi couldn’t see the boy’s face.

“Sorry brat, but that won’t be happening. Pretty sure that place’ll be closing down soon.” It hadn’t been that long since he had left the shop, but the mystery guest had to have shown up already, and Levi was sure he hadn’t done that great of a cleanup job. He stupidly hadn’t given himself enough time to plan that part out.

“That’s not...“ The boy paused, and Levi stared at the body before him. “...home.”

The boy lifted his head and gazed into Levi’s eyes, his emerald eyes full of so many emotions that Levi was speechless. Tears were falling from his eyes.

“I want to be free.”

A sudden ringing made Levi’s eyes burst open and he jolted upright, breathing heavily. He glanced around the room, confusion quickly subsiding as he realized he was in his bedroom. The ringing continued on, and he simply stared at the wall, trying to catch his breath, until the ringing finally came to a stop. He took a deep breath, running a hand through his hair.

The ringing started up again and Levi groaned, reaching for the cell phone on his nightstand. He hadn’t talked with Hanji in a few days, and as annoying as he knew they would be if he answered the call, he felt a need to distract himself.

“Jesus, do you know what time it is? What the fuck do you want?”

“Good morning to you too!” The person on the other line chirped happily, the shrill tone making Levi’s head hurt. “For your information, I tried calling you like ten times last night. So it’s not my fault you didn’t pick up until now!”

He couldn’t remember his phone ringing the night prior, but his mind felt a bit murky from waking up so suddenly.

“Okay, fuck, what do you want?”

“Petra called me.” Hanji paused, before continuing. “She said she wants to see you.”

“Funny, considering she’s the one who told me to leave.”

“Seriously, what happened? No matter how much any of us ask her, she won’t tell us anything! It’s not like her to keep things bottled up--you know she’s the type to face any problem head-on--so I guess something really serious happened?”

“No shit, Sherlock. She wouldn’t kick me out over something stupid.” Levi sighed, standing up to stretch out his arms. He didn’t need to keep his phone by his ear to hear Hanji’s response.

“So tell me what happened! Pretty pleeease!”

Levi pinched the bridge of his nose, quickly reaching the limits of how much Hanji he could handle in a single day. 

“We grew apart.”

“Really? That’s it?” Hanji huffed. “We both know she’d never throw you out over something like that. She’d try to fix it!”

“Fuck, do you always have to be so nosy?”

“It’s my job to be nosy!” Hanji was a journalist after all, so it made sense. Levi didn’t know anyone better at pestering someone until they finally broke down and spilled their guts than Hanji. Luckily he had known them for quite some time, and had quickly grown immune to all the badgering.

“Listen,” Levi sighed, “It’s over. That’s all there is too it. We loved each other once, but don’t anymore. She decided she couldn’t trust me and told me to get out. It’s been almost a year. I’ve gotten over it and she will too.”

“She hasn’t gotten over it, not even slightly.”

Levi just shrugged, not feeling the need to respond. It was true that they had loved each other once, and it was true that she didn’t trust him anymore. Hanji didn’t need to know why that was. He was glad that Petra understood that as well. She obviously hadn’t said anything to anyone, seeing as how he wasn’t sitting on a bed in prison at that moment.

“Well you should still come visit. Everyone misses you, and Erwin said the office has been a mess since you left.”

“Gross, why would I want to come by if I’d be visiting a dump?”

“Would you rather we visit you then? Where are you anyway? Nobody seems to know where you moved to, Levi.”

“Fuck, I’ll visit you eventually, four-eyes. Now fuck off.”

Levi ended the call without letting Hanji even take a breath. There was no way he was going to have anyone visit him. He had made sure not to leave a trail when he had left Petra, and with what he had done the other night, the last thing he needed was for Hanji to bring Petra along and her catch wind of what was happening.

As much as she loved him, Levi knew she’d go to the police if she knew for sure that he was still doing it. She was too good of a person.

He groaned and threw his phone onto his bed before heading to the bathroom to wash up. When he looked at himself in the mirror, Levi was disgusted. He had bags under his eyes and his hair was sticking to his skin. He must’ve been sweating all night.

Levi made sure to use cold water as he proceeded to wash his face, hoping it would help to fully wake him up and pull his mind away from the dream he had had.

_ That dream… _

He paused, slowly lowering his hands to grip the countertop. It had definitely been a dream, but it had felt so real. He still felt the rumbling of the thunder, and the rain pelting his back. He could still smell the stench of the old woman’s rotting body.

He could still hear the boy’s soft, broken voice.

Levi’s eyes went wide.

The boy.

The boy who he had pretty much kidnapped, and gone as far as to murder someone to do it. The boy who he had just tossed somewhere in his apartment before falling into that dream.

“So I didn’t actually hear his voice…”

Cautiously, Levi stepped out of his bathroom and back into the bedroom. If his memory served him correctly, he had thrown the boy onto the bed before taking a shower. He didn’t remember moving him after that, yet the boy was nowhere to be seen in his bedroom.

Could he have run away? Somehow Levi doubted that. The boy in his dreams wanted to be free to return home, but obviously was unable to by the way he spoke. Levi knew there was no way his dream was fact, but it had felt so real--the emotions the boy had expressed through his eyes didn’t seem to lie to him, even in a dream.

Making his way out of his bedroom and into the living room, Levi let out a relieved sigh as he found the boy slumped over in one of his chairs. He seemed to be asleep, but then again, he always seemed to be asleep.

But why was that? Levi couldn’t come up with a reason for why the boy seemed so lifeless. The first time he had seen him in the rocking chair, sure, he could have just been asleep. But yesterday he had murdered someone with the boy just in the other room. The old woman had been talking to him too, so how had he not been awake and aware of what was happening?

The most confusing thing to Levi was how easy it had been for him to just grab the boy and carry him all the way back to his apartment. He hadn’t been gentle with him at all, and it had been pouring. Yet the boy hadn’t woken up, hadn’t moved an inch.

_ But then how do I explain him moving to the living room? _

Levi needed to figure out the boy that intrigued him to no end, and now that he had him in the privacy of his own space, he could do as he pleased.

“Time to wake up, brat.”

No response. Levi clicked his tongue and stepped toward the chair, right up to the boy. He grimaced, but proceeded to tap his bare foot against the boy’s rather harshly. No response. He sighed now, crouching down so that he could get a better view of the boy’s face.

He looked so peaceful, like he was lost in a sweet dream. The boy’s eyelashes were long, his nose thin with a nice shape. The more Levi looked at the boy, the more he looked more like a sculpture than a living being. The shape of his face captured the image of youth too perfectly--he was thin, his features sharp, yet Levi could see a bit of the plumpness of his cheeks that he hadn’t quite outgrown yet.

He didn’t look a day over fifteen, if Levi had to make a guess.

“Never would’ve thought the day would come when I’d pick up a fucking brat,” Levi exhaled, lifting a hand to lightly trace the boy’s features. That’s when he felt it.

Something about the boy’s skin felt so peculiar, and Levi continued to slide his fingertips up the boy’s cheek as he contemplated why that was. He was so smooth, unnaturally so, yet he felt firmer than Levi remembered a human to be. When was the last time he had touched someone like this anyway? At least a year now, probably longer. It was before he had started to feel the itch again.

Before he had felt the life he had built slipping through his fingertips.

Levi lifted his other hand so that he was now cupping both of the boy’s cheeks and lifted his head slightly, so that their eyes were on the same level.  _ If only his eyes were open though _ . He wanted to see those eyes again, the eyes that had left him breathless in his dream. The beautiful eyes that would finally be able to replace hers.

“Wake up,” he spoke softly, while sliding his hands up into the boy’s messy brown locks. Still no response. “I don’t want to have to hurt you.” He gripped roughly at the boy’s hair. “Yet.”

But the boy still didn’t wake up. No matter what Levi resorted to, from slapping him around to throwing him to the floor, no matter how badly he roughed up the boy, he didn’t wake up. He simply laid there, body on its side with his face pressed into the floor. It made no sense, and Levi was growing angrier with each passing second.

“You’re going to regret defying me.”

His palms itched so badly as he made for the kitchen, pulling out whichever handle he managed to grab from the knife block. He usually preferred to work with just one specific blade, but at that moment he just didn’t care. All Levi wanted was for the boy to open his eyes, and show him the pain and fear he longed to see.

Stomping back into the living room, Levi didn’t even consider moving the boy off of the rug before he straddled him, his free hand once again gripping the boy’s hair and holding his head down as he brought the knife to his exposed neck. He was ready to do it, but was able to stop himself in that moment.

“Don’t fucking kill him, Levi,” he mumbled to himself, pulling the knife back slightly. For a moment he stayed completely still, mentally reminding himself that he couldn’t let his frustration rob him of the opportunity to see those eyes again. If he slit the boy’s throat and made him bleed out, there was no way he’d be able to open his eyes for him again.

After taking a deep breath he sat back, staring down at the body below him. The gut would probably be his best option. He knew the human body well enough to avoid a fatal wound. He didn’t want to kill him, not yet. But Levi wouldn’t mind seeing him bleed.

And as quickly as he had decided, Levi had plunged the knife into the boy’s stomach, as far in as it could go. He had grabbed one of his smaller knives, so it wasn’t a very deep wound, but he knew from experience that even a shallow cut could bleed profusely if placed on the right spot.

He was ready for the blood to ooze out around the knife and stain the boy’s shirt, for him to suddenly awaken and writhe in pain, gasping in shock, his eyes wide and shining with fear and confusion.

Yet no matter how long Levi waited, he didn’t get to experience any of this.

He was absolutely quiet as he pulled the knife, slowly, from the boy’s body, placing it down on the floor. With shaking fingers, he pulled up the fabric of the boy’s shirt.

Levi didn’t know how to react to the sight that greeted him. Where he had plunged the knife was the gash he had expected, but there was no blood. His skin was torn, almost cracked, but not a single red drop had made its way out of the wound.

Unable to believe what he was seeing, Levi quickly reached for the knife again, releasing the boy’s hair to grab his arm and hold it up so that he could drag the blade over the boy’s bare flesh. And again, though a long, fresh wound was made, there was no blood.

The knife slipped from his hand as he just stared at the boy’s arm. It didn’t make sense. There was no logical explanation that Levi could come up with. There was just no way that a living being couldn’t bleed.

He paused, his gaze moving from the wound to the boy’s face, mostly obscured due to his positioning.  _ Is he even...?  _ It was a stupid thought that Levi shouldn’t have bothered to entertain, yet the more he did, the more he realized that he really didn’t have any proof. He had never once truly seen the boy move. Yes, he had had his eyes closed one moment and open the next, but he hadn’t seen  _ him _ open his eyes. He just saw him with his eyes open.

“Shit, are you going crazy?”

Maybe he was. There was no other explanation. He was sure he had felt a warmth from the boy when he had carried him through the rain the night prior, but the more he looked at him, the more lifeless he became. The boy had sat in that corner of the shop like some precious treasure. Everything about him was so perfect, eerily so. Like someone had taken a real human being and preserved them, turned them into a piece of living artwork. It was as if he was--

“A doll.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ooooohh what's this? something spoopy supernatural happening?! mayhaps the real story I was wanting to write is finally coming to light! but really, let me know what you think is going on! also also, if you'd like to keep updated with how this fic is going, or just chat, please feel free to follow me on twitter!!!!! (@JUNEISE) I would love to chat with my readers and make some new friends ; w ; oof I'm so happy I was able to consistently upload a chapter in a week for the second week in a row lol. I'm sorry if it feels like things happen very quickly in my story. I feel like that's where I lack greatly as a writer rip. but yes thank you for reading this far!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for not posting a chapter last week! Work has been hectic the last few weeks, so instead of writing I've just been sleeping. orz But I hope y'all enjoy this chapter! (Sorry for any and all typos!)

He had probably overdone it, just a little. In the wake of his absolutely ridiculous realization, Levi had dragged the knife across the boy’s limbs too many times for him to keep count, hoping that the next time would prove his stupid thought false. That moment never came.

Levi sat back with a heavy sigh and stared up at the ceiling, watching the blades of the ceiling fan turn. His mind was racing, yet it felt empty at the same time. He just didn’t know how to process what was going on. Levi considered himself a rational man, tried to find reasonable explanations for any questions that arose (aside for the ones that involved his own mental state) and he never fell into any bullshit like fate or the wonders of the world that couldn’t be explained.

And now that he was faced with exactly that, his mind just didn’t know how to process it.

In the distance he could hear a melody playing from his phone, an alarm he had set more recently to establish a new reading routine. If it was already going off, then that meant it was midday, and Levi had spent a good number of hours simply staring at the ceiling thinking about the boy.

After what felt like ages, he looked over at him. The boy--doll?--had remained exactly as Levi had left him, rolled on his side with his face obscured. Both his clothing and his skin were littered with cuts, holes, cold wounds that showed no signs of life behind them.

He felt sick just thinking about it.

The blood was what completed things for Levi, yet it never came. Levi could have driven his blade deep into the boy’s wrist or even hacked off one of his limbs, but he knew now that he still wouldn’t get what he wanted. And it made Levi angry.

_ Did I really just risk everything for a useless toy?  _ It had been so long since he had killed someone, not a one since he had completely settled into his life in the rainy city. But now he had a body count, and it was a body he hadn’t been able to comfortably dispose of on top of that.

All for the boy that somehow wasn’t even alive.

It made no sense, none of it, yet his mind kept reeling to find an answer. Things didn’t add up. He had pretty solid evidence that the boy wasn’t alive. Living beings needed blood pumping through their veins, after all. But there was no way Levi would have ever wanted the boy if he hadn’t sensed life from him.

And Levi knew life and death intimately. There was no way he’d made a mistake like this.

The boy had had warmth. His skin was kissed by the sun. His eyes had shined with emotions so deep and conflicting that Levi had fallen for them the first moment he had looked into them.

“I need to get out of here.”

He really did.

Levi paid no mind to what clothes he grabbed and changed into. As long as he was mostly covered up, he didn’t pay much mind to his wardrobe. Not that there was much variety for him to choose from--he was a dark shirt and black pants man through and through.

He stepped quietly around the apartment, passing the body laying on his living room floor a few times as he made multiple trips to and from his bedroom, groaning each time he had to go back for something he forgot. It wasn’t like him at all to be forgetful, but he’d go easy on himself this one time.

Each time he passed the boy, Levi paused to glance at him, to check if he had moved even just an inch. He still couldn’t see the boy’s face though, so there was no way for him to know that the boy’s eyes were cracked open.

The unknown gaze peered through the messy brown hair, following Levi as he grabbed his keys and made his way out of the apartment.

The doll just laid there, alone, tossed aside as always.

 

There was no chance in hell that Levi would go back to the bookstore, not when that disgusting employee could be there. The last thing he needed was for his palms to start itching again. It wasn’t like he reacted to just anyone, but having just killed the old woman, only to be disappointed by the boy, he knew the disgust he had felt from being around the woman at the bookstore would only grow. It was probably not a great idea for him to be outside and around others at all, but he just couldn’t stay holed up in his apartment with the boy and his anger.

He spent a couple minutes simply walking down the street with no destination after he had exited his apartment complex, but when his stomach growled, Levi settled on the small coffee shop around the corner. Some food and a warm drink would probably do him good since the temperature seemed to have dropped overnight. The rain was light, thankfully.

A soft bell chimed as he entered the cafe, and it took all of his subconscious to suppress the memory of entering the old woman’s shop the previous day. Others had seemed to share his sentiment for a warm drink, because the small coffee shopped housed more people than he had expected, which was good and bad. He welcomed the many distractions, but it also meant ignoring more temptation.

He waited in line, absentmindedly glancing around before it was his turn to step up and order a drink. Hanji always compared the coffee he ordered to himself--straightforward and boring, they said. He did just order black coffee, with no sugar or cream.

With said drink in hand, he moved to an empty corner table, the perfect spot for watching the other customers. He had a small family, a group of teenagers, and a few loners to choose from. Levi’s gaze settled on a woman seated at a table by the window.

She looked just as bored as Levi was sure he looked, maybe even more, as she just stared out the window at the rain. Black hair framed her face and fell just past her shoulders, and he couldn’t exactly figure out why, but she felt familiar to him.

He thought she had been alone, but a man joined her at the table not long after. Levi hadn’t seen him in the cafe prior to him sitting down across from her, his bright blond hair fairly noticeable after all. The man sat with his back to Levi, so he couldn’t see his face, but their tables were close enough for him to faintly hear his voice.

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”

The woman nodded in response and took a sip of her drink. Levi also took a sip of his coffee, satisfied with the warmth that spread through him.

He felt warm, while the boy in his room probably remained cold.

“I was going through my grandpa’s things and found these,” He started, enthusiasm slowly turning into a soft warmth as he continued, “I thought you’d like to see them.”

From what Levi could see, the blond man had placed a number of photos on the table. The woman seemed reluctant to look at them, the unease and sadness in her eyes making Levi curious as to what they were photos of. She picked one up and simply stared at it for a long moment, before her eyes began to water and she flipped the photo over to cover the rest of the ones on the table.

“Thank you, Armin...” She choked out the words before dropping her face into her hands, her shoulders shaking as she quietly sobbed. The man placed a hand on top of the photos and sighed, leaning back in his chair.

Levi continued sipping his coffee, intrigued, but by the time he had finished his drink, no new words had been spoken between the two. A shame, he thought, as the welcomed distraction had come to a quiet end. Even after sipping down a refill of his coffee, no words had been spoken between the two at the table by the window. The woman had stopped crying at least, and instead was slowly making her way through the photos the man had brought.

Levi couldn’t see the photos though, and the woman had managed to harden her emotions enough that they hardly showed in her eyes, so there was nothing for him there. He glanced at his watch, mildly annoyed that only an hour or so had passed, but decided it was time for him to leave the cafe.

As he walked out the door and down the street, the woman’s eyes followed him.

 

After an hour of simply walking around and ducking into random stores for no rhyme or reason, Levi returned to his apartment to find the boy exactly as he had left him. He just stood there, staring down at the body on his floor, not entirely sure why he had been expecting something more. Maybe if the boy had moved, he would’ve been able to write off his doll theory. But then that would make even less sense, since the boy had no blood in him and clearly couldn’t be alive. If he was moving then that would make him--

“Fuck, what is this, a horror movie?” Levi groaned, annoyed at the boy, and at himself for even entertaining such stupid thoughts of supernatural happenings. Obviously going out to distract himself had been just that--a distraction, a temporary situation, because as soon as he got back, his mind was racing with thoughts and theories and unreasonable explanations.

Out of irritation Levi swung his foot hard against the boy’s shoulder, the force rolling him onto his back.

Levi paused, and stared down into the half-lidded eyes looking up at him.

“Fuck.”

He’d never be able to find the words to describe how beautiful those eyes were.

Levi made quick work of hooking his hands under the boy’s arms and lifting him up to a seated position, glancing around his living room before throwing the boy over his shoulder and hauling him over to the lone chair in his living room. He tried not to think too hard about how light the boy’s body was.

After placing him down he stepped back and simply looked at the boy. He felt more natural in the chair, like when Levi had first seen him. The boy looked alive, but with his head falling to the side slightly and eyes half open, he just looked like he was nodding off. He was falling asleep, but alive.

Oh, how Levi wished that was the truth.

A knock at his door pulled him from his thoughts, and he narrowed his eyes as he stepped towards the door. He glanced back, nodding to himself as he assessed the boy’s position--one wouldn’t notice the boy right away from the front door since the chair was off to the side of the room--before he opened the door. As he thought, the many books he had purchased the previous day were delivered. Levi spoke a quick greeting to the delivery man and signed a slip of paper before he was handed a large box. It was heavy, but that meant he’d have a lot to read. And reading meant more distractions.

And Levi simply went to his bedroom, closing the door behind him, and read for the rest of the day. He read the first book he pulled out of the box, from cover to cover, then simply moved onto the next. And when his mind started to drift away from the contents of the book and toward the mystery on the other side of his door, he grabbed another book, not even bothering to mark the page he had stopped on.

Levi repeated this process for the rest of the day, into the night, until even the light of the bright moon wasn’t enough for him to make out the words. With a groan he tossed the book back into the box and rubbed at his temples. A headache had begun blossoming only a couple hours into reading, but he had chosen to ignore it. He regretted that now, and opted to remedy it with some rest.

He washed up, changed into a loose shirt and sweatpants, then stood at his bedroom door, hand hovering over the doorknob.

_ Just to be sure. _

He opened the door, just enough to see that the boy was exactly as he had left him, eyes still half-lidded as though he was trapped in the moment right before falling asleep.

Levi shut the door and laid down on his bed, letting his eyes close.

When they opened, it was like his body was moving on auto-pilot. He was straddling the boy again, thrusting the knife in his hand into the boy’s stomach. It was the same wound, the one that hadn’t bled. He was repeating the same actions, dragging the blade across the boy’s skin over and over, carving into any and all exposed flesh he could find. They were all the wounds that hadn’t bled.

He dropped the knife, just as he had done before. Levi hadn’t even realized that he was unable to break from these set movements until his entire body went rigid. It was as though time had stopped, yet below him, a different time was moving forward.

His gaze stayed on the boy’s arm, where drops of red were slowly surfacing from the lacerations. A cold shiver ran down his spine.

_ He’s bleeding. _

Yet as badly as Levi wanted to reach forward, feel the warmth of the blood, smear it around and make sure that it was real, his body wouldn’t move. He was absolutely frozen, only his gaze able to linger over his body.

And when his gaze landed on the boy’s stomach, he felt as though his heart stopped at the sight. The deep gash was weeping blood, pooling around the small body and staining the carpet beneath him.

It’s all that Levi had wanted, and he didn’t understand why he couldn’t have it.

“Hurts…”

The voice was so weak that Levi almost missed it.

“It hurts…” The voice cracked, and Levi’s gaze snapped to the boy’s face. It was still slightly obscured, most of his face pressed into the carpet, but he could see it. He could see the boy’s lips moving ever so slightly as he murmured the same thing over and over.

“It hurts, it hurts, it hurts…”

And he wouldn’t stop. Levi’s ears were ringing with the boy’s pained gasps, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He couldn’t move.

“It hurts… Dad…”

Levi’s eyes shot open. He threw himself up into a seated position and gasped for air, glancing around the room just to confirm where he was. His entire body was rigid and cold shivers struck him to the core. He had no idea what was going on, yet somehow understood completely.

As soon as his breathing had steadied a bit, he was up and heading for the door. He didn’t hesitate to shove the door open and step up to the lone chair, still panting slightly as he simply took in the sight before him.

The boy was sitting there, exactly as he had left him. With his head slightly lulled to the side, his gaze fell past Levi. His eyes were still ever so slightly open.

His clothes were stained with blood, as was the chair and parts of the carpet below him. And though there were steady lines of dried blood littering his arms, when Levi reached forward to wipe the red away, there wasn’t a single wound left.

Levi was past the point of searching for some sort of logical explanation now. The wounds he had made the night before (he had barely registered the morning light slipping through his blinds) were gone, but the result that should have been was now there. And it had happened after he had dreamed of inflicting the exact same wounds on the same body.

“I must be crazy.”

And as crazy as it was, Levi wanted to make sure that what was happening was  _ really _ happening. And the only way he’d be able to do that would be by repeating his actions.

Levi glanced down at the carpet and groaned.

“Let’s make less of a mess next time, shall we?”

And he was suddenly hit with the overwhelming urge to clean.

Levi spent the next couple hours cleaning every inch of his apartment, even though the mess had been contained to just where the boy sat. But if he was already going to clean a portion of his carpet, why not do all of it? He made quick work of lifting the boy up, careful to not let too much of the blood on him transfer onto his own body, and carried him to the bathroom. With a frustrated sigh he placed the boy in the tub, face scrunched in disgust as he pulled off the boy’s clothes and shoved them in a plastic bag. They were disgusting and Levi knew he’d be throwing them out, but he knew it’d be a better idea to wash them first instead of leaving bloody clothes in the trash, lest they be discovered and rouse suspicion.

He filled the tub enough that the boy was mostly submerged before he set off to scrub his entire apartment clean.

And that’s how Levi spent the entirety of his day--rubber gloves pulled up to his elbows with a mask over his mouth to keep any and all filth off of him. The carpet had been in the worst shape, and he knew his apartment would smell like bleach for a long while afterwards. He’d have to throw out the chair now that the wood arms were stained, and he had already made a trip to the dumpster to discard of both the boy’s now washed clothes, and the clothes Levi had been wearing that morning.

Even if he hadn’t gotten blood on them, they still disgusted him.

He took a short break from his normal cleaning routine to scrub the boy’s body from head to toe, even washing his hair and trimming his nails. Though the boy was limp and lifeless, the moment felt strangely intimate as Levi dragged a rag down one of the boy’s long legs. He silently took in the sight in front of him, simply for the sake of seeing it.

It wasn’t lust in his eyes, but simple curiosity. When was the last time Levi had touched someone like this without any sort of intention, good or bad? He was cleaning the boy only for the fact that he would be clean, nothing more and nothing less.

It felt strange to him--almost as if he cared. And when he realized that, Levi quickly finished cleaning him and went back to cleaning the rest of the apartment.

By the time he was done, only the light of the moon was pouring in through the blinds. The boy was dressed in whichever shirt and sweatpants Levi had bothered to grab, seated in the middle of the couch with his head resting back against the plush cushioning. Under him was a towel, for precautions. Levi stood before him, knife in hand.

Levi was dead tired, but felt incredibly satisfied. Any time he went through a cleaning binge, he felt good after. And he wouldn’t admit it, but maybe he felt like giving the boy a break, just this once. The only wound he inflicted on him that night was a slow, shallow cut down his forearm, with just enough force to draw blood (or so he hoped, considering he likely wouldn’t see the blood until the morning).

And he went to bed, dreamt of himself harming the boy, and woke up to the sight he had been expecting. The wound was just shallow enough that the blood hadn’t run down his arm and onto his clothing, instead just remaining in a thin red line.

And now Levi knew that no matter how crazy it had sounded in his head, it was true.

A small feeling of excitement began to bubble deep within him.

He spent the next couple days simply repeating this process. He kept the wounds small at first, but each evening, he’d approach the boy and feel the excitement bubbling up within him. The wounds became longer, deeper, and grew in amount.

The worse the wound, the more the boy in his dreams spoke to him.

It wasn’t much, still small mutterings of pain, calling out for his father, but slowly his voice grew louder, and his pleas for the pain to stop became more frequent.

Levi loved the sound of the boy’s voice, especially when it begged him to end his pain.

His new doll--toy--was more interesting than he had ever expected.

 

Levi didn’t emerge from his apartment until the next week. He hadn’t wanted to, but the state of his fridge left him no choice. He needed to eat, after all. He made his way through the light rainfall to the grocery store, packing his shopping basket only with the essentials. He didn’t eat much, and it wasn’t like his new roommate of sorts was adding to the shopping list, so he had more than enough to last for a while.

It was strange for him to be outside his apartment again. Even though it had only been a handful of days--he had locked himself inside his home for much longer periods of time before--Levi felt strange walking around in the open, without the feeling of the boy’s gaze following him. The doll’s eyes had fully opened after the second night, and no matter where Levi was in his apartment, even with walls between them, he felt that gaze on him.

It was unnerving, yet somehow only added to that bubbling feeling within him.

It was an excitement he hadn’t felt in a long time.

“Excuse me, sir!”

A high-pitched voice broke Levi from his thoughts. He cursed under his breath, not usually the type to space out and not notice someone walking up to him. Had he been thinking about his new toy that deeply?  _ Don’t get ahead of yourself, Levi. _

“What?”

Levi looked at the person in front of him, pausing as his gaze swept over the blond hair on the man’s head. The man he had been eavesdropping on in the cafe last week was now standing in front of him, a large stack of papers in his hand.

“I was wondering if you could look at this for me?” He pulled a paper from the stack and held it out to Levi, who in turn used the hand not holding his grocery bag to lightly pinch the corner of the page. He grimaced, the paper soggy from the falling rain. Who was stupid enough to pass out fliers here of all places?   
  
He glanced down at the paper and narrowed his eyes.

“Have you possibly seen this woman before?” The blond man spoke, slightly turned away as he taped one of the papers to the side of the building next to him.

The old woman simply stared at Levi, from both the paper in his hand and the paper on the wall.

“She’s my grandmother. I was supposed to meet with her at her shop last week, but she hasn’t shown up... I’m worried that something may have happened to her.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are appreciated and loved and help me to keep writing! I'd also love to hear any theories if anyone has some 👀 I promise an explanation will come, but we gotta let Levi feel crazy a little while longer!


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